We know that living with and caring for a disabled family member can be a big challenge.
We have to make certain sacrifices and be considerate so that things don’t feel even worse for them.
But… if you were in that woman’s shoes and your family did not support your ambitions and said you had to settle for less for the sake of your disabled sibling, would you obey them?
Crazy, right?
Read on to find out what happens in the story below.
My older sister Rita (20f) is disabled.
My sister’s disability brings with it numerous health problems. Although she is mentally capable, she cannot do much physically and had great difficulty even in regular school.
She never graduated from high school because she became so ill during her senior year that it set her far behind and she did not get the grades to graduate.
Rita feels like a failure
She was offered the opportunity to repeat the test, but she declined because she still felt very ill afterwards.
This is something that causes her a lot of grief and she still cries because she feels like she has failed in the worst way.
Nobody can convince them otherwise.
She doesn’t work, go to school or anything else.
She is at home and is looked after by our parents.
In the meantime, a training opportunity has arisen for the young woman.
I (17f) am still in school and am currently in my final year.
There was a lot of discussion about college and what other paths I could take.
I received information about this training course that could be a perfect fit for me and my study advisor wanted me to take a look at it in the summer because they also accept high school graduates.
It’s exciting.
Her parents advised her to think of Rita before making a decision.
Rita was really upset when she heard that I had so many options.
And not for the first time, my parents expected me to think of them before making decisions.
They suggested that I either focus only on community colleges or not go to college at all and work in retail or the service sector instead.
They told me that in this case I could afford my own apartment.
Because of her sister, she had previously missed or let many opportunities pass her by.
I couldn’t go to camp because Rita couldn’t and they didn’t want me to have experiences she couldn’t have.
I was not allowed to participate in school plays because Rita was not allowed to participate in hers (my parents even forbade my teachers from letting me participate).
They refused to sign a consent form that would have allowed me to take part in a competition on behalf of my school because Rita would never have the opportunity to have such an experience herself and they did not think it was right for me to have this experience now.
The permission came because I might have to travel if I wanted to go somewhere.
Rita was always angry and felt bad.
When I was young, they took me out of art class because I was great and got a lot of praise.
My parents actually pressured me and asked if I could leave class, but they took me out anyway.
Rita was always upset when I achieved something or got a great opportunity.
She cried and asked me why I got everything and she got nothing.
I felt sorry for her, but it also annoyed me that she was happy when our parents held me back.
Now they call her selfish because she only thinks about her future.
It all escalated into an argument when the college thing came up again and my parents saw that I was looking for an apprenticeship. They asked me how I could even think about it and how selfish I was.
They said I should aim lower for Rita’s sake.
Rita heard us arguing about it and said she knew I was too selfish to give it up for her.
I told them I hate them because they expect this from me.
Rita and my parents said I had no sense of family loyalty at all.
Is this possible?
Wow! This is really an exciting family drama.
Let’s see how other Reddit users react to this story.
This user says OP should live her own life.
Louder, please.
It’s not their fault, says this user.
He says what they are doing to her is abuse.
Finally, he suggests that she has to leave her home.
Do what you have to do, girl.
It’s your life and your future, not theirs.
If you liked the story, check out this post about a clueless CEO telling a web developer to “act like a paycheck”… and it leads to 30% of the workforce being laid off.
